I think this is my fourth attempt at getting all of the way through a blog post here at training camp. The Lord has shown me so many things that He’s doing and the Spirit has brought so many convictions, but landing on one single topic has been such a challenge. I had the feeling that something greater was still coming, I just wasn’t sure what. The Lord made it so extremely obvious this past week.

The Lord was trying to show me love…simple love. 

I am very goal-driven by nature, and this applies to my faith and pursuit of the Lord as well. I strive to find areas that I could better glorify the Lord or areas that I need to die to the flesh and lean in to growth. This isn’t bad in theory; I simply want to grow closer to the Lord. However, when it comes to the faith, this is not always the necessary answer.

A conversation with one of our mentors, Luis, opened my eyes to how my perspective had been off. I came to him with several questions that I had been wrestling with regarding different habits, convictions, and goals I had in regards to my faith. I came with a heart ready to surrender. There are so many things that I don’t know about my faith, but I know one thing for sure. I want more of Jesus. I wasn’t sure what I needed to do, but I was ready. As the Lord usually does, He revealed a simple answer. Love.

I was working hard to do the right thing, but my aim was off. I wanted correct actions. I wanted to be disciplined. I wanted to to know what I could DO. What I needed was relationship. It became so clear. All of these things that I wanted to do didn’t need to be forced, but rather flow naturally out of a loving relationship. My focus and effort were on the actions needed to get to the Father, not the Father himself. I was backwards. The greatest commandment that the Lord spoke through Moses to the Israelites is just as important today as it was more than three thousand years ago, and it is rocking my world in the best way. “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might.” Not surrender to the Lord with all your might. Not be disciplined in following the Lord with all your might. But to LOVE the Lord with all your might. Our actions then flow from that love. (John 14:15-17)

The message of this simple children’s ministry memory verse brought me to tears this past week. I had been on the search for answers. I had hoped deep down for a secret strategy or detail that I had glanced over in my desire for intimacy with God. While in a worship session last Wednesday and a conversation with Luis, the Lord could not have made it more obvious. I was so lost in wanting to figure out how to be close to Him that I wasn’t stopping to just love Him. We don’t serve a God that wants us to find the secret way to His heart; He knows that we’d overcomplicate it. It is against God’s character to make the path to intimacy complex or difficult. (1 Cor 14:33) He loves us too much for that. (Rom 8:35,37-39). He just simply wants our love. Our genuine love.

Although the answer is simple, it is not always easy. “For the gate is narrow and the way is hard that leads to life, and those who find it are few” (Matt 7:13-15). As in any loving relationship, intimacy with the Lord requires sacrifice, commitment, and as Moses preached, your whole heart. The culture surrounding us wants us to love the fleeting things of this world such as status, wealth, fun, or even security. These things aren’t bad in of themselves, but if they are the focus, then we are lost. We can’t buy the lie that both love of the world and love of the father can be attained together. Scripture does not preach this message of the comfortable gospel that is so easy to fall victim to in America. Scripture actually says the opposite. “Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world- the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride of life - is not from the Father but is from the world.” (1 John 2:15-16). 

I can’t think of another time in my life that the Lord has laid out a lesson so clearly to me, and I’m excited to see where it leads. He is doing so much, and I’m happy to just be a part of it. I feel like I could write a book about all that the Lord has shown me about this in the last four days, but this is already long past our recommended blog length so I guess I should wrap it up. I’m sure this wont be the last blog I write on this topic as I learn day by day what it means to love the Lord.

As always, thank you for taking the time.

Carter